Lemonade Time! February 5, 2010
Posted by Teresa in Health Related, Inspired by a book.Tags: colds, diet, disease, kindness, master cleanse, my book, Spirit, words
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So I have a cold, again. I used to be so healthy, but the other day I caught another nasty cold. I’ve had 3 in 3 months! I got one while in Beijing (with a fever and everything) and then another one just before New Years. I spent New Year’s Eve at a friend’s cabin, had a great time, but could barely talk. When I felt like saying something, which was approximately every 20 seconds, I had to think really hard to decide if I really needed to say it. It’s a good exercise… most of the time I had to conclude that my clever quip could go un-said. I have less timeless wisdom than I thought! Anyways, it was fun, and in about 6 days I had pretty much kicked that cold to the curb. So, a few weeks ago, we went to Las Vegas, and California, and except for an occasional cough, I felt great. We got back to Alberta, and Darren and I took my niece and nephew to the waterpark at West Edmonton Mall
, which was a hoot! We rode the waves in the pool and did some slides, too. I forgot how much fun those slides could be! 
I swallowed a little water — got hit by a wave I wasn’t ready for! Afterwards, we got drawn in to the candy store (if you know West Ed, you know the one) and bought some Jelly Belly jelly beans. They are my favourite! We started munching them immediately — we were so hungry from all the swimming! — and I kept munching them until bed time. I know, not good for me, but they are so flavourful! Fake, artificial flavours, I know, but anyways…
The next day, I woke up with a nasty head-stuffing cold! Man! Initially, I blamed the swimming, and germs from snotty-nosed kids in the pool. Well, I’m the snotty-nosed one now, and I actually want to blame the jelly beans! But, if they are to blame, then I must have been pretty low-immune system/toxic already. Isn’t it amazing how “toxic” we feel when we’re sick?
Darren and I stopped at an organic grocery store and while there, he found a booklet on “The Master Cleanser” by Stanley Burroughs. Besides describing how the combination of lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne makes a good cleanse, Burroughs talks about germs and viruses in a completely different way. He says that they are always present in our bodies and we should be grateful for them because they help us clear toxins from our bodies (he talks a lot about toxins), such as when we get a cold and our body produces a great deal of mucous to get rid of toxins. Interesting idea… I don’t know if it’s entirely true, but it’s something to think about! This line of thinking helped me be less resentful of the cold, seeing it more as my friend, and made me think about the timing of my last 3 colds — after being in Beijing, eating all sots of strange food (not always fresh, food with lots of sauces), after Christmas (which involved a few sweets and goodies, and although I didn’t majorly pig out, it’s more food colouring and sugar than I’m used to), and after Las Vegas. What do you think? Any chance it’s related to toxins… and more than a co-incidence?
And then there’s a whole other idea: that disease is caused by disharmony in our spirits. Now, I’ve meditated and thought about this, and I’m afraid to say that my colds might be related to unkind words. I admit that around those times I may have said some unkind words to Darren — not in arguments exactly, just bits of sarcasm or, well, unkindness. So, while I am doing this cleanse to help my body clean out toxins, I am also going to clean out the last bits of sarcasm, sharpness, or even wittiness that isn’t completely innocent and building others up. I think this will have a wonderful, positive effect on my spirit, much moreso than any dietary change! Think about it — beautiful, uplifting words to make a perfect, healthy throat and lungs. Makes sense to me!
For now, I’m finishing day 2 of the master cleanse, and day 1 of my kind-words-only policy. I’ll keep you posted on how I’m feeling!
In other news, progress continues of my book. The artist, Biliana Savova is working hard on the illustrations, which should be complete next week! This is all so exciting! I am going to be approaching a few people to read it and provide an endorsement for the back cover — a nice little quote on the back to say how great my book is! I need to work on the website… I’ll let you know when it’s ready so you can all go run and check it out! Take care everybody!
Las Vegas!! January 31, 2010
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: growth, life, Vegas, workshop
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I haven’t blogged lately due to lots of travelling! It’s been great! We attended Steve Pavlina’s Conscious Growth Workshop in Las Vegas, then rented a car and drove around California visiting some friends (and meeting new people). Then, we drove back to Las Vegas for one last night — a fun one! — and flew home the next day.
What an amazing conference! The energy and excitement was palpable as soon as we rounded the corner to the lobby outside the conference room! The people I met there were some of the most amazing, conscious, aware, loving people I’ve ever met. There was sizzling electricity-like connection with a few of them, and a nice genuine, instant-friend connection with others. They are people who look you in the eye when you talk to them, who are careful listeners and concerned about me and where I need to grow, and I in turn, was able to do the same for others. Steve taught us all the principles in his book, Personal Growth for Smart People, which I hadn’t had the chance to read.
His idea, after a lot of research and reading what some other personal growth people had to say, is that all areas of our growth can be boiled down into a 3-part model, Truth, Love, and Power, which he illustrates on the points on a triangle. Along the sides, there is Oneness (between Love and Truth), Courage (between Love and Power), and Authority (between Power and Truth). We evaluated each area of our life on paper, then reviewed it with another person for feedback on how we were doing, and how we could better accomplish our goals. Steve and his presentations along with the amazing conference attendees made for a great workshop. I was a little sad when it was over, but I’ll be keeping in touch with many of my new friends.
Las Vegas itself was an interesting place! It seems everyone I talk to has already been, so I’ll skip over most of my initial observations. I made my own triangle for Las Vegas, which is Big, Loud, and Bright. Some things are Big and Loud, some Big and Bright, others Bright and Loud. There are people standing all along the street, mostly men, handing out “business cards” for girls (escorts, I suppose), and we wondered how those men are paid. Is it by the number of cards they give out? I thought we should call for a girl, and once she came to the hotel room, sit her down and ask her a bunch of questions about how it works and what it’s like to be a call girl. We didn’t do it, but now I wish we had! Sexuality certainly seems more in-your-face in Las Vegas than in most places… I’m not sure why exactly. I think it goes back to the origin of the city, something I’d like to research.
That’s all for now… I don’t have the pictures off my camera yet (I’m not even home yet, just have some time and internet access). I’ll post again soon!
Okay, as promised: Pictures of Las Vegas (click for larger versions)!
The view from our hotel window. We could both see and hear the fountain show at The Bellagio, which was always impressive.
View down the strip
Another view of the strip, this one showing the huge poster for Human Nature, a concert I went to see on my last night there. They were *awesome!*
This view shows the place we stayed, Bill's Gambling Hall & Saloon. 
Not quite so glitzy in the day time, eh? This is the view out our window also. The Eiffel tower is pretty cool!
My one main regret is not taking any pictures at the conference itself, of all my new friends! I had planned to do that on the last day, but forgot the camera in the hotel room. Oh well.
Celebrating Life January 9, 2010
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: community, compassion, conflict, death, emotions, feelings, grief, life
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Today has been an amazing day. Darren and I went to Willie’s funeral today.
I didn’t know Willie directly, but I’ve heard of him lots. He helped out at a couple of the organizations I volunteer with, donating his time and equipment to spray paint some bookshelves, for example. He owned and operated a painting business that painted anything and everything, but mostly interiors. He was known around town to be very helpful, always willing to donate time or help someone out. He was active in his church, and the pastor kept saying how he loved the church, and the people in it. His impact on the community was evident in the number of people there — around 400, we figured, which in a town of less than 4,000 is a lot! (That would be like over 100,000 people showing up for a funeral in a city of a million.) I know his wife a little, and I’m very good friends with one of her very good friends, so I feel a kinship.
Even though I didn’t really know him, I cried a little. What made me cry? Thinking of how Barb, his wife, must feel. Imagining myself in her place, a new widow. Thinking of how the kids must feel.
Darren and I debated about whether to stay for the fellowship afterwards, and we decided to stay at least a little while. We ended up sitting across from some strangers who turned out to be very nice people, and we chatted quite a while, sharing philosophies on life, how to stay out of a rut, that kind of thing. We also chatted with our neighbours, friends, and people we know around town for various reasons. There was a wonderful feeling of community, and although there was some sadness, it was not completely mournful. After the funeral, the interment, and the luncheon, there was a memorial service, which we didn’t stay for; it had an open-mic component and I am sure it celebrated his life even more.
The truly amazing part happened after we got home. My honey and I sat and talked and talked and talked. We talked a little about what we’d like at our funeral or where to be buried (neither of us is very picky), and then we talked about what we had observed at the funeral, how we felt about it, and what the preacher had talked about and how sometimes we related to it and sometimes not. It was all good, some things we just see differently. We both also noticed how we were easily able to just allow others to have their own funeral experience, and not judge or mentally comment on them. Darren said that it’s quite a change for him and an indication of how comfortable he is in his own skin, and I agree! I have come a long way from the awkward, self-conscious, anxious, fish-out-of-water that I used to be in many social situations. I just wasn’t comfortable. I guess I wasn’t always like that — sometimes, I wonder what my mom thinks when she reads my blog (my dad doesn’t use the computer). Does Mom say “that’s not right!?” I bet my perception of myself is different from others’ view of me… Mom, feel free to comment any time! But I remember feeling quite insecure and fearful of some social situations.
I think some of my uncomfortable feelings were rooted in a deep inability to handle any kind of conflict between differing points of view. I just couldn’t stand the thought of debating with someone about something personal. If someone became too assertive, I just wanted to run. I’m not really like that any more; I enjoy exchanging views with people, especially if they are able to stay calm and logical, although I am also better able to witness/handle other’s raw emotions, even grief. It’s something I’ve learned how to do by necessity because of the volunteering I do. I’m able to put up a little distance between me and the other person and yet stay engaged in the situation — not withdrawing into a shell or wishing I were somewhere else. Sometimes I have to tell myself “you are not a sponge. This emotion/feeling in the air can go right through you” and that helps me somehow. And I never used to think of myself as very empathetic/touchy-feely, since I was so uncomfortable with others’ emotions, but perhaps I’ve grown in that area too.
Anyways, I just wanted to share that little bit. I will be thinking of Willie’s family, and thinking of ways I can help in the coming weeks and months. There are always lots of people around at first, but that tends to drop off, while the grief yet lingers.
Peace On Earth January 6, 2010
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.1 comment so far
My husband and I are getting ready to go on a trip, in a couple of weeks. We bought our plane tickets a while back, and I remember discussing with him, as we pored over expedia search results, what flight to pick based on departure time. I convinced him to pick the only one with an 11:00 am departure, partly because I am NOT a morning person (6:00 am departure means I have to be at the airport when?!?! And get up when?!?! Just let me stay up all night instead). Now I am especially glad that we chose it, in light of these “increased security measures” at the airport.
I admit — I don’t keep up with the news much. So, I hear it was taking up to 6 hours to get through security before their flights?!? Seriously?!? That is completely ridiculous, and I think we can all agree that travel by train is starting to look extremely attractive. I went over half way across Canada by train, by the way, when I was a student and it was very enjoyable… as long as you didn’t have to be anywhere on a certain day. I think our train was about 18 hours late arriving. But it was nice!
I also heard that people wouldn’t be allowed to get up or do anything at their seat (keep anything on their lap) for an hour before landing. That makes me want to go even more. (Sorry for the sarcasm, it just leaks out sometimes.)
All this because someone did something somewhere on a plane at Christmas time. I hear security is always stepped up at that time of year, at least in some parts of the world (not mine). I wonder why this is… because there is a perceived increase in threat. Security analysts say so. Because bad people apparently like to carry out their evil plans at this time of year. And yet, millions of people, Christians, are supposedly praying for Peace on Earth, extra hard, at that time of year. Does this strike anyone else as ironic?
So it made me think: what is wrong with our thinking, those of us who pray for peace on earth and don’t get it? I think it’s because we don’t really believe in it. We don’t really actually think it can happen. We don’t imagine it ever being possible. We pine for it, like a child pines for a puppy in the window, or a toy at the store — “but Father, I want it” — or like a knitter oogling some gorgeous yarn. (This is the idea, and you can probably think of an analogy to suit yourself.) Whatever it is, we want it, but don’t actually think we will get it, haven’t imagined what we’d do if we got it, and maybe aren’t even responsible enough to care for it. We whine for it, thinking that more whining (praying) will get it, not realizing that it’s not just about repetition. Isn’t a whiny child annoying? If the parent buys it things to make it stop, the child quickly learns to “execute that program” whenever it wants something. But God is not like a parent! Definitely not! Whining has no effect on Spirit, only on us. It causes us to focus on what we don’t have, not what we do have, and eliminates gratitude instantly. And we believe we’ll be happy when we get whatever we’re pining for, without realizing that happiness comes from within, not outside.
That includes peace. We won’t necessarily be happy when there’s peace on earth if our happiness does not come from within!
Most people think “oh, wouldn’t it be nice?” when they think of peace. But that’s as far as they go. It’s way more powerful to really imagine what the world would be like — use your imagination to its full capacity, as far as it will take you. Then, start to believe that your vision — that peace — is possible! Have you ever imagined a vacation, and when you got there, it was exactly like you had hoped and you said “yeah! This is exactly what I imagined! This is awesome!” That’s the feeling you’re going for, the feeling to create in yourself (oh, did I forget to mention you can create whatever feeling you want in yourself, sorry).
Yeah, peace is going to be amazing! I can’t wait! This is awesome!
Of course, the trick is to do this without ever getting discouraged by what you might hear on the news. Or from anyone else who is discouraging. And without buying into the whole notion of terrorism, evil people, and danger all over the place. That’s the trick. That’s always the trick when you would like something to be different… to believe it is possible despite the naysayers. Without any leaking sarcasm. (Hmm, that might be tough.)
Ramifications January 4, 2010
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: brain, Buddha, cause and effect, children, ego, environment, non-attachment, power struggle, ramifications, relationships
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For the size of our brains, we really don’t think very much, do we?!? Sometimes we think we have a situation all figured out, but we really don’t!
Interpersonal stuff can be so tricky, or is it just me? For example, I have a friend, let’s call her “Susan,” who has a boss who is becoming increasingly more controlling, questioning, and untrusting. When this started, her first response was to be a little angry, frustrated and resist. Don’t we all want to resist being controlled?! One day, the boss demanded she fill in timesheets to track what she did every hour she worked. She began taking responsibilities away from Susan, saying “it wasn’t her job to do,” even though she’d been doing those things very well for quite a while. Then, the boss wanted Susan to write a report to summarize what she’d been doing, so all the managers could review it at a monthly meeting! Susan felt like her word wasn’t good enough, that she wasn’t being trusted. It’s not like she was a slacker, wasting time in the coffee room all day — she didn’t even take breaks!
Luckily, my friend’s capacity for anger and frustration ran out. She decided that if they wanted more reports, fine. If they wanted to question her, fine, she’d answer. She knew she wasn’t doing anything wrong, and if she had to prove it, fine. So far, things seem to be settling down, largely because she has changed her own attitude to the situation.
But she could have had a very different response. What if she had been snarky (a temptation, for sure) and put on the daily reports that she spent 2 hours doing reports for the boss! She might have thought this very clever, a little “dig” to point out the boss’ ridiculousness. But the boss could have reacted very badly, saying “that simple, one-page report took you 2 hours?!?” There could have been many ramifications — being sent for time management training, having one-on-one meetings to review how the reports are to be done, or just more hostilities between them, as the power struggle intensified. That’s what it started to feel like — a power struggle of epic proportions! Okay, not really epic, but do you see how we can blow things out of proportion? Susan has done a great job thinking and then responding, although it hasn’t been easy.
From dictionary.com: Ram•i•fi•ca•tion n. A development or consequence growing out of and sometimes complicating a problem, plan, or statement: the ramifications of a court decision.
We seem to get in our worst trouble when either A) we don’t take the time to think before responding (just reacting) or B) we don’t know as much about a situation as we think we do (just plain ignorance). For example, people get angry at the big oil and gas companies for what they are doing to the environment. 
“We need to shut them down,” they say. I love nature, and I agree with the sentiment, but what are the ramifications of shutting down gas and oil companies overnight? Could you heat your house? Drive your car? How would you eat — do your groceries arrive at the store via truck, or via electric train? See what I mean? Very few of us are are really well-informed, and have taken the time to look at an issue from many sides and see all the consequences of our proposed solution.
I came across a blog today, about choosing not to have children. There were many comments on it, and I shared it with Darren and we spent a while reading some other blogs and sites we found. Some people only see the issue from one side, and are very opinionated! I’ve had a few thoughts on it myself, but I think this is the key: have kids, or don’t — but think about what you’re doing and decide. Don’t just have them because it’s expected of you, because everyone thinks you should, or accidentally. Did you forget the ramifications of having sex?
Some people get into huge arguments with friends or family members about the child-bearing issue. It’s always harder to have a calm discussion — thinking before responding — when we are emotionally charged or attached to a situation or issue. With my husband, sometimes I just talk without thinking — ack! If only I took 3 seconds to breathe and think, instead of immediately responding! Why do conversations have to be so rapid-fire? Am I really in that much of a hurry? Yes. No. Of course. Come here. Talk to me! Darren thinks before speaking way more than I do, and sometimes I get frustrated when he takes so long to respond! Talk to me, Goose! (If you get that reference, you rock!)
Perhaps if I practiced more of the Buddhist idea of non-attachment, it would be easier. As I understand it, this doesn’t mean I’m not attached to my husband (don’t care about him), it means I am not attached to a certain outcome of our discussions — intensely needing him to agree with me, for example. We can agree to disagree, and I can accept and respect that he has his own perspective and it’s every bit as valid as mine. I think non-attachment is powerful, but I don’t know enough about it to say more now!
Now that I think of it, words have the most ramifications of any of the daily, ordinary things we do. They can make or break a relationship, change our attitude, and even change our world.
On a personal note, I have been working hard on publishing my book lately! I’ve been in conversation with an artist about the illustrations I need and I’m all over the lulu.com site, learning about how it all works and deciding on page sizes. Then I go into my publishing program and mess with page sizes, margins, fonts, and all that fun. It won’t be long now! I’ll keep you posted…
A Day of Lasts January 1, 2010
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: airport, canoeing, dream, Flow North, kayaking, love, paddling
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Today is a day of lasts. It’s the last day of 2009. 
It’s my last day working for Nav Canada. I cleaned out my locker about a week ago, and my mailbox today. Tomorrow, or early next week, my email account will be deleted. There will be no traces that I ever worked there, actually. I took my honey jar (for my tea, of course) and my special sea salt. It feels a little weird, knowing that I’m off the schedule, and all the work I went through 4 years ago is not paying off any more.
I decided to apply to Nav Canada for several reasons: to see if I could make it in, to move back to western Canada, and because I thought it would be something I’d enjoy. I was right on all counts! I scored high enough on the aptitude test to get a call back within about a week. When I finished the training in Cornwall, I got posted to High Level, Alberta — not exactly close to my family, but at least it was driving distance. And I have certainly enjoyed it! I have been challenged, stretched, and stimulated. I learned to listen quickly, processing information and forming a mental picture much quicker than I thought I ever could. I accomplished my goal! I was one of the elite, working for Nav Canada in the air traffic system. I got to talk to pilots and watch planes and helicopters land and take off every day! What better job could there be!?
And in spring, when I had a chance, I chose to get out. I took an early departure package. Part of me was afraid of being transferred somewhere I didn’t want to live — it sounded very seriously like High Level FSS would close — and part of me saw the opportunity to take control of my life in a new way. I sat and thought about what I would like 
to do, if I could do anything at all and be paid for it. The answer was paddle. I love to canoe and kayak. So, I decided to start a canoe and kayak outfitting company, to make it possible for people to get out on the water — to spread the love! The love I have of paddling. I named my company Flow North Paddling Company, at flownorth.ca.
So, it’s a slightly melancholy time, but also a happy time. There’s a little stress, and I think I’ve already experienced the last time I go to the grocery store and buy whatever the heck I want! Without looking at the prices! I will be on a budget now… but I’m not worried. Not oblivious to the money situation, but not worried.
So, I’m looking forward to a lot more adventures in 2010… may you have many happy adventures in the coming year, too!
Surviving Cabin Fever December 26, 2009
Posted by Teresa in Health Related, Silly stuff.Tags: cabin fever, cold, exercise, food, health, TV, winter
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It’s been a while since I did a Top Ten, so here you go! Perhaps others don’t have such a hard time with this, but I think it’s relevant for the season!
Teresa’s Top Ten ways to combat cabin fever when it’s been too cold for too long:
10. Get smashed. Go to your liquor cabinet, with a tall glass in hand, and pour one shot of each liquor — whatever you’ve got — into the glass. Add ice, if you like, and a splash of orange juice, coke, or grenadine, depending on your tastes. Drink one of these every hour until you can’t walk, talk or think. JUST KIDDING! Don’t do this! If you do, you’ll have the worst hangover ever! But I guess you wouldn’t be bored any more! Seriously, it can be fun to invent a new drink, with just one or two types of liquor and have one or two with a friend.
9. Clean something. Ya, I know, it’s not a very fun one, but it’s a productive way of spending some time at home… tackle that messy hall closet or scary corner of the basement. Keep reading, I have better, funner ideas coming up!
8. Eat something. But not just anything… Scour your cookbooks or go online 
and make something wild and fantastic you’ve never made before. Like this chocolate cake (it took me three days to make last year!), these brownies (so strange yet soooo yummy!), or a spicy curry dish (one of my favourite meals). Maybe you’ll have to make a trip to the grocery store, but you probably have a lot of crazy ingredients at home that you could use. Check out the “leftover wizard” at bigoven.com. Don’t be afraid to substitute ingredients if you don’t have what you need and you don’t feel like leaving the house. Then savour your creation!
7. Make something. If you’ve got a project half-done, finish it! If you don’t, check out the Make webpage and see if you’ve got something around the house that you can transform into, say, a guitar!
6. Grab a book. You probably have a few books (or 20) that you’ve bought or been given, that you just haven’t quite started yet. Grab one, and a nice warm beverage, cozy up in your favourite spot and read the afternoon away.
5. Play a game. If you’re home alone, I guess it’ll be solitaire or something computer-based. But if you have family or friends over, convince them it’s time for Twister, Wii, or get out the cards. Aggravation is one of my favourites, or Blokus. No doubt you’ve got something you can play… strip poker anyone? (Not to be played with granny.)
4. Learn a new hobby. Got something you’ve thought about trying? Why not do it now? You can find videos for almost anything online, so as long as your internet (and your furnace) work, you can do anything! You could learn to knit or crochet, do yoga, do tai’chi, make fishing lures, build something out of wood, learn photography, start a blog or podcast… your imagination is the limit!
3. Play music. Get out that guitar you haven’t played in months (or the one you just made) and learn some new chords. Or, if you find your house strangely lacking in musical instruments, go through your music collection, listen to something you haven’t heard in ages (your fav’s from the 80’s!) and just enjoy the tunes! Dance your heart out. Air-drum along, or use pots.
2. Get off your duff. Step away from the TV, or computer (not right now, as soon as you finish reading this), and get some exercise. Most of us have some form of exercise equipment around the house, and most of it is rarely used! Blow the dust off, get out the track pants, and burn a few calories. Don’t do it because you have to, do it because you’re bored silly — do it for your sanity! (I promise it will help.)
1. Do something fun outside. This is perhaps the hardest cure
for cabin fever, but it’s also the most effective. Bundle up, wear double scarves, toques, mitts, whatever it takes, and go outside. If you’ve got equipment like cross-country skis, snowshoes, ice skates, or a ski-doo use it! If not, simply take a walk, go tobogganing (cardboard will work on a packed hill), make snow angels, or stomp out patterns in fresh snow. When you get back, you’ll be glad to be inside, cozy and warm!
The overall strategy for curing cabin fever is distraction. Distract yourself from the fact that it’s freezing and you’re stuck inside… that you’re bored or lonely… that it’s cold and only getting colder… I hope this blog will help you distract yourself with something that’s mildly productive or fun (more fun than TV)!
I think I’ll do my next blog on how to dress for cold weather. It’ll be practical and fun, yet serious life-saving stuff! Check back in a couple of days!
Happy Birthday Jesus December 25, 2009
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: baby, cake, Christmas, Jesus, Spirit
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As you can tell from my last post, I’ve been thinking a bit about Christmas lately. What makes it good? What makes it frustrating, annoying, or “bad?”
Just a pic I found on the internet. Not the cake the church had!
I used to go to a church that had a Christmas morning service. The preacher encouraged people to just sort of “get out of bed, open your gifts, and show up,” even starting a tradition of bringing kids still in their PJ’s. Nice idea! Certainly more practical than expecting people all decked out in their Sunday best. He would ask all the kids who were there to come to the front of the church, and then we’d all sing happy birthday to Jesus — literally, using the song and everything. After church, there’d be birthday cake, which was mostly for the kids, but I think more than a few adults indulged in a piece! I used to enjoy those times, although it did seem a little superficial. Having no tradition of Christmas of my own to refer to, I had no historical background, so I guess I was a bit more analytical than most.
So I’ve come to one conclusion: I think one thing that’s so annoying about Christmas is that “yay, Jesus is here!” attitude. If Christmas is supposed to be the time we celebrate Jesus’ birth, why is that all we celebrate? If my friends wanted to celebrate my birthday in a big way, I hope they would say more than “hey, you showed up!” Wouldn’t it be nicer if they said “we love you. You are great! You are funny, warm, caring, honest…” appreciating me for who I am.
This reminds me of when people congratulate a man for the birth of a new baby! For Pete’s sake, he did none of the work! He just got to have fun once! The woman did all the work — enduring morning sickness and all the changes to her body, feeling bloated and later just plain heavy, and of course, the big finale, birth! That’s no party! So next time you want to express joy at the arrival of a new baby, focus on the woman! But I digress.
The second part of the Christmas attitudes that baffles me is the “oh, I’m so glad he was born so he could die for me.” Do people think about the baby’s death at the baby shower? Do you talk about that? Hmmm, I don’t. “Geez, he sure is adorable, I hope he doesn’t die in a car crash. That would be tragic.” 
Or, alternately, if you’re remembering someone’s life, you don’t focus on the very end, do you? “Grandma sure suffered at the end, didn’t she? Oh, she tried to be strong, but those last couple of months were rough. Too bad she couldn’t talk because of the stroke.” Nope, in my family, when we talk of Grandma, we remember her pickled carrots (the best!), her grilled cheese sandwiches, her “get up and go” attitude, her positivity, her independence after Grandpa died, and how she shoveled her own walk — even swept it! — until the last year or so when we convinced her to hire a neighbour boy to do it. We don’t talk about the circumstances of her birth or her death — we talk about all that happened in between.
So, if you’re a Jesus-celebrating person, I hope I’ve given you something to think about. He was awesome. He was so loving to everyone he met. He did miracles, with ease. He had a beautiful spirit. I’d like to be more like him.
But I’m still not really “celebrating” Christmas. Not the way most do.
Life Without Christmas December 23, 2009
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: Christmas, distraction, drama, life, love, religion, school, TV
4 comments
Christmas is fast approaching, isn’t it? The days surrounding Christmas can sure be fun! Crazy! Exciting! Busy! Frantic! But not for me!
I grew up without Christmas. (pause for the shock to sink in) The religion my family belonged to didn’t celebrate it. If you are an old school mate, you might remember what a “weirdo” I was; I didn’t make cardboard jack-o-lanterns at Halloween
— it was strictly pumpkins for me. All the trappings of Christmas were stripped of art class — no Santas for me! — I made “winter trees” or snowmen. My poor parents had to go to parent-teacher interviews each year and explain the situation. I think it was much harder for my older sister, with her classmates and teachers. At least when I came into the system 2 years later, the teachers remembered my weird sister and would say “oh, yes, we remember the drill. No Santas, no valentines, no Easter bunnies.”
We didn’t have anything to do with these holidays, with Christmas causing the most fuss. Think about it — what do kids talk about for a MONTH at school? Where they are going for Christmas, what they might be getting, the candy, and then in January, for another week, the only topic of conversation is what they got for Christmas. I don’t think the kids who rode the school bus with me were trying to be mean when they asked “what did you get for Christmas?” But my answer stunned them every time: “nothing.” I think some of them thought it was because we were so poor (I wore a lot of hand-me-downs in those days)! Kids who weren’t in my class didn’t see the all the other signs I was different than the rest.
I am not bitter for growing up in this different way! My sister and I put up with quite a bit of teasing and shunning; I didn’t have any friends at school until grade 5 or 6. I am very grateful for the kids who did befriend me! Some of the teachers treated my sister and me differently too, besides the basics of being banished to the library during Christmas concert practices. Actually, that was kind of fun, ’cause we had the whole place to ourselves and could run, make noise, and throw paper airplanes!
I survived the school years without any aspect of Christmas. When our religion changed and started to become more main-stream, many people struggled with how to change their thinking and traditions. We had our own traditions and holidays, you see, that were quite meaningful and beautiful. It was as hard to toss them out as it was to accept new ones that had been the source of our rejection, and we’d been criticizing, for all those years. Christmas trees are pagan, phalic symbols, don’t you know!?!
So, it might come as somewhat less of a shock to hear that my husband and I aren’t really doing much for Christmas. We have lights on our house, and some family/friends will get small presents, but we aren’t giving anything to each other. 
I don’t think we did last year, but we got married at the beginning of December and things were pretty hectic due to that (our wedding was also a small, un-hyped affair). Do you think that strange? Impossible? Crazy? Maybe it is for you, but I think a LOT of what happens at Christmas is pure distraction. Some traditions are lovely and some families do manage to keep it simple, but MOST of the stuff that happens has nothing to do with Jesus (the reason for the season, you know) or family bonding. Never mind the soap-opera-like baloney that goes on among people offending each other, re-offending, being offended, shunning… mostly because of presents or other silly reasons. The stories I hear from some people make my head hurt!
This got me thinking that a lot of what happens in life in general is distraction. I use the radio as a distraction on my drive home, for example. To keep me from thinking about what, I don’t know. TV is a very bad culprit for this, and so are books. We enter another world through these media… I wonder what is wrong with the one we’re in? Jobs, tasks, goals, children, hobbies, material things, holidays, traditions, and entertainment are all huge distractions to what we really are. Perhaps you’ve heard the expression: We aren’t human beings on a spiritual journey, but spiritual beings on a human journey.* I think that sums it up nicely.
In the busyness, craziness, and loveliness of this season, please don’t forget that we’re all on this planet to share an experience. Don’t try to control others, just as you hate to be manipulated. Be patient. Love the ones you’re with.
* quote attributed to Stephen R. Covey.
Just saw this, and it’s too funny!
Happy Winter Solstice! December 22, 2009
Posted by Teresa in Ponder This.Tags: party, solstice, sunrise, Sunshine, winter
2 comments
Oops, I’m a day late with my “happy winter solstice” blog! I have a good excuse, though — on the day I should have been writing this blog, the 20th, I was making chocolates at a friend’s house! They turned out yummy, if melty… the milk chocolate I bought wouldn’t get very runny when melted, and once hardened and released from the mold, would start to melt in your hand as soon as you picked it up! Awesome!
Anyways, happy shortest day of the year — woo hoo! It doesn’t get any darker than this! And I am glad for that. Our day (sunrise to sunset) is only 6 hrs 17 minutes, and the maximum height the sun reaches is a measly 8.5 degrees! I have discovered that the sun does not shine in either of the kitchen windows (facing SW) until just before it goes down; the neighbour’s house casts a shadow all over ours. But that’s ok… in summer, the sun is gloriously high and the days wonderfully long… that’s what one has to remember at this time of year.
I can understand why ancient people would have had a festival shortly after the solstice — when you could start to measure that the days were getting longer. Maybe it was a distraction, a reason to party, or maybe it was just being grateful that the shortest day has come and gone and although it might not get warmer for a couple more months, it won’t get any darker.
To visualize the way the sun’s position changes, check this picture out (photo by Anthony Ayiomamitis):
This Astronomy Picture of the Day shows how the sun moves throughout the year — it is a composite of many photos taken at the same time and place, over the year. The up-and-down part you probably understand, but do you know what causes the left and right motion? Leave a comment if you know!
