Have you heard the expression, “he is an impressionable young man?” I always took that to mean that the boy was likely to take a passing comment to heart too much, or that if you mentioned something to him, it might have such an impression on him that he forms a whole way-of-being based on it. For example, if you said, “I really like Bob’s hair cut,” he might go get the same haircut and wear his hair that way for years. Or if he saw a successful man in a nice suit, he’d realize who had the power and then spend years of his life trying to be that guy.
Do you know any hypochondriacs? Whatever the new disease, they’ve got it? Those pharmaceutical commercials on TV must be a killer on them — always needing to run to their doctor to find out if XYZ drug is right for them! Can you imagine? Another example of “an impressionable” person — believing that if someone else can get this-or-that illness, then they are vulnerable to it, too.
In so many ways, we can all be impressionable or hypochondriacs, don’t you think? Except we do it with ideas. We take other people’s ideas about how the world is, and we make them our own. If it applies to them, it must apply to me, too. Maybe it’s the abuse of scientific thinking — if Bob found it to be true, it must be true for everyone, like physics or chemistry. But that just isn’t the case! What can be absolutely true for one person can be completely false for another. And (to really bend your brain), this can even apply to physics and chemistry.
I’m having a hard time thinking of examples. Here’s one that might work: Darren and I were driving home from a Christmas party. He commented, in a worried tone, that this section of road seems to be ice. I thought, “why on earth is he saying that? Why is he worried about that?” If I had been driving, I might have noticed a certain sheen to the road, but we have good winter tires, and as long as you’re going a reasonable speed — which he was — then there is nothing to worry about! I said something along these lines, and Darren seemed kind of offended, because I wouldn’t join him in his worry. But why? There is nothing to worry about! He pointed out the sliding marks where someone before us had slid on the road. I said, “so what? Some people have banana peels for tires!” But, there was clearly a huge rift between how I was feeling — happy from time spent with friends, great music, and yummy food — and how he was feeling. Of course, feelings come from thoughts, and he had been thinking worried, unhappy thoughts before that.
So, what could I do in that situation? I absolutely believe that it does not help anyone to join them in their worry. Definitely. But, to be cheerful in the presence of someone having a worry-party just doesn’t work. If I’ve tried to cheer them up and they just won’t, I have to leave them be. I guess if they have been through some sort of trauma, I would sit and just be with them, but in the case of last night, I just couldn’t get on board. Which I guess is me judging the situation and not feeling that it warranted all the concern Darren was intent on giving it. Yet, we can all be hypochondriacs and overly-impressionable, so I definitely could have been more compassionate.
That’s growth. That’s living in relationship. That’s life! 🙂 I think all we can do for ourselves is to try and be aware of what areas of life we are impressionable in, and what we are exposing ourselves to. Perhaps focusing on health would help us not to get sick (because we can be hypochondriacs), or spending time with people or watching TV that exposes us to “sick” thoughts. What if you paid attention to how certain shows on TV make you feel? If you feel unhappy about yourself, or unsatisfied with your home/clothes/hair/job/whatever, then that show is planting ideas in you (because we can all be impressionable at times). Are they ideas you want to grow? If not, you have to weed them out! And that is so much harder than not exposing yourself to that seed in the first place.
As always, just my thoughts on things!
P.S. I passed my final evaluation! 🙂 (Read the post here.)