Acceptance April 24, 2008
Posted by tkneller in Ponder This.Tags: acceptance, thankfulness
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There is power in acceptance. When we accept ourselves completely, we are free from thinking we aren’t good enough, from hating parts of ourselves, even free from striving to be something we aren’t. We can see ourselves as we really are – another member of humanity, no better or worse than anyone else, and we’re all pretty damn amazing!
Accepting ourselves leads to acceptance of others. When we’ve dealt with our own junk, our own issues, we can see and accept others much more easily. We realize they are human too, maybe with some issues of their own, but that’s okay. When, at our absolute core, we don’t judge ourselves harshly, we are more understanding of others too.
Accepting our life’s circumstances is also important. By accepting what we have now, where we are now, we remove our desperate wanting. Wanting things to be different (different job, spouse, kids, etc), wanting more ____ (money, stuff, toys, friends, popularity, holidays, etc), wanting less _____ (trouble, work, bills, snow, etc). When we learn to accept what is, we come back to the present, stop moping about the past or pining for the future and we’re instantly happier. It means we stop rebelling against God and life and all it
’s given us. Thankfulness helps us accept things as they are, and always leads to more contentment, too.
We often take things for granted! We, healthy people, take for granted that we can get up and do things, go places, and sleep at night… when I work midnight shifts, sleeping is not always easy! We take for granted we can have a shower any time we want, get food any time we want, call our friends or family any time we want. There are people living in parts of the world that can’t do any of those things with any measure of reliability, and from what I’ve heard and seen, on the whole, they complain less than we do.
Thankfulness leads to acceptance of what is, which leads to acceptance of ourselves, which leads to acceptance of others, which leads to more kindness, understanding, tolerance, compassion, and love! I wonder what would happen if we all took a little time out to accept ourselves more.
Little Wisdom February 5, 2008
Posted by tkneller in Inspired by a book, Ponder This.Tags: acceptance, inner peace, negativity, striving
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I told my sisters one day not too long ago, sitting in one of our favourite restaurants, that I am done with striving. I don’t think they understood at first, but I tried to explain. I have been moving towards true acceptance of myself, and I’m no longer “trying” to be something I am not, and am quite happy with exactly who I am. That is not the same as saying there’s nothing I would want to change about myself, but I am no longer “fighting the good fight” or “struggling with ___ (fill in the blank).” Instead, I’m taking on an attitude of peace towards myself (and indeed towards everything I can). As I was reading The Deeper Wound today (which I am thoroughly enjoying and getting so much out of!) a few lines particularly struck me:
“Be gentle when you are tempted to be harsh. Pay attention when you are tempted to turn a blind eye. Accept that the negativity you are feeling belongs to you when you are tempted to blame someone else.” – Deepak Chopra
I think this is so deep! And it describes how I want to be – not the battle I am fighting with myself, but simply how I want to be. Maybe it sounds like semantics, but it isn’t. But I admit, it is hard to explain, especially if you are used to fighting with, or doubting, yourself all the time.
There’s one thing I feel I should clarify – although Deepak writes “accept that the negativity you are feeling belongs to you” this doesn’t mean that every time you feel negative about something, this defines who you are – that it’s yours, like a possession that you own and will never get rid of. You can realize that you feel this way, but not get hung up on it. This goes hand in hand with not being perfectionistic when it comes to your traits, thoughts or actions. I know this is harder for some people than others, but I think that being kind to yourself is one of the best things you can learn to do!! Start with something small and just do it! Be kind! And when we’re kind to ourselves, we find it that much more natural to be kind to others, too.
Some things to think about… take care, everybody!
